D&D players think they have it the best, with their magic items and buddy-backstabbing and Heads of Vecna and all that.
But what they don’t realize is that they’re actually just pawns in the Dungeon Master’s game.
That’s right. You’re not the players. You’re the playing pieces.
You have a backstory? I MADE THE WORLD THAT BIRTHED IT.
Nice magic sword you just found. It’d be a shame if something… happened… to it.
Your wizard lived long enough to cast Wish? Let me introduce you to the lich who wrote all your spells, knows how to counter each of them, and whom you now owe royalties to for use of his intellectual property.
You spend your nights talking about how your barbarian got laid in an Underdark brothel. I spend it designing deathtraps and horrors from beyond.
Your average adventurer is really nothing more than a parasitic murder-hobo. The Dark Sun campaign setting? What happens when adventurers are left unchecked.
DMs are the adventurer’s apex predator, and we love our job.
Face it, PCs: at the end of the day, it’s all about the guy behind the screen planning your imminent demise.